Women are weird. Every spring they think that they need to go through the entire house and purge it of things that they don’t use. Or that they think we don’t use. And we could just let them. But then we’d be looking for our fishing rods come summer time. So, we have to help them and succumb to the list.

I swear, my list gets bigger and bigger every damn year.

I used to put it off but my wife and I made an arrangement. Whoever finishes their list first gets to have a day to themselves to do whatever they wanted to do – as long as it wasn’t cheating or running away from home. We work together to create two lists that are fair.

Guess what? I’ve finished first every year except for one. She has no idea what I do on “my” day but the reward is worth it. I spend the day at Rhode Island Dolls in Woonsocket, RI. Sometimes I bring a buddy but I’m find to go by myself, too. It’s the best day of the year. Last year she decided that she didn’t like not winning so now we both get our day – but the lists still have to be done first.

But a trip to RI Dolls in Woonsocket, RI seemed like the perfect incentive to getting my spring cleaning done. Well, I started on my list right away. The sooner I start, the sooner I get my day to relax and enjoy watching the dolls!

This year the lists seem to be bigger than ever. I groaned when we finished making them. There were at least five things on my list that I didn’t really think needed to be done every bloody year. But, you know women.

Of course, with the incentive of RI Dolls, I powered down and finished my list – first as usual! I still win.

Tomorrow is the big night and it is all I’ve been thinking about. The guys are going to pick me up in the late afternoon and we’re going to head over there for dinner. Rhode Island Dolls may be a strip club but they have an awesome kitchen and a great menu. I can taste the steak already and those awesome home fries. And a beer.

Ok, I drink beer at home sometimes or when I’m out for supper but the beer at Rhode Island Dolls just tastes better for some reason.

And of course – there are the dolls! I haven’t been there in a long time so I am really looking forward to seeing the dancers. I wonder if my favorite dancer is still there. I can’t even remember her name it has been so long since I have been there but I can see her in my head. Beautiful, long, shiny brown hair and big brown eyes that just make me melt inside. And a body that just doesn’t stop! Curvy, sexy, soft – I have had her in my mind all week long!

All the dancers at RI Dolls are gorgeous though, so if she isn’t dancing there I’m sure I’ll find someone else that I like just as much. The guys and I will enjoy the dancing on the stage and then one of us will get a lap dance and then eventually, each of us will get private dances. That is my favorite part. For those few minutes of a private dance, I am young and hot and interesting again. I’m someone else. It’s not that I don’t like who I am or like my life. I do. But every guy has a fantasy that they want to play out. Including me. It’s just a little one. And it doesn’t do anyone any harm.

My wife finished her list shortly after I finished mine and she’s heading to the spa with her girlfriends the following weekend. Since she had to wait a whole week for her reward, I gave her the night, too. That way she can’t complain too much when I come in late and maybe a little bit inebriated! I know she will have a great time. But I don’t think it can compare to having “my” day off at Rhode Island Dolls. I still stop in once in a while for a quick beer but that’s not the same as having a full day off to hang around beautiful dancers with your buddies!