If you’re anything like me, your “honey-do” list is biggest on Saturdays. My wife just seems to think that I have nothing better to do than run around doing errands. Ok. I know she has her own list, but just once, I’d like to spend a Saturday laying on the couch, drinking beer, and watching sports.
That’s not likely to happen though. You want to know my secret to getting through the errands list? I make a deal with myself. When I’m done, I can go to RI Dolls in Woonsocket, Rhode Island. I can enjoy my beer there and watch the dancers. I have a deal with my wife that as long as I finish my list, I get those few hours to myself. As long as I’m not cheating on her, I can do what I want when I’m done and she doesn’t ask questions.
I’ve got this whole errand thing down to an art. I’ve learned exactly where my wife’s favorite places are. As soon as I get in the car, I get on my phone and pre-order the things I need to pick up so that I can be in and out in the fraction of the time it might take otherwise. When I’m at the grocery store, I’m super focused. I go to the same place all the time because even though I sometimes might pay more for stuff; I know they have what my wife wants in stock. I’m in and out faster than you can blink an eye.
My wife thinks it’s just because I had to go to several places and the lineups were long that it takes me so long to get the errands done. What she doesn’t know is that in the time I save being speedy at the errands gets spent at Rhode Island Dolls, the best strip club in Woonsocket, RI.
They open at 6 PM on Saturday, so I’ve got plenty of time to get things done. And because it isn’t quite as busy as normal, there aren’t a lot of other guys around to steal the attention of the dancers away from me. In fact, it is usually pretty quiet, so the dancers are quite happy to see me.
I always make sure to have cash on hand to tip the girls that are performing in the afternoon. Since it is usually not the busiest shift, they are super happy that a paying customer has come in and they pull out their best moves.
I don’t drink alcohol in the afternoon because my wife will smell it on my breath and because I need to drive home, so that gives me a little extra spending money. And what do I do with that?
Well, I usually treat myself to a private dance. There’s one girl there that often works the Saturday afternoon shifts. I won’t tell you her name – my little secret – but she’s got booty to spare, she’s soft in all the right places, and she’s got a long mane of blonde hair that drives me wild. I just love it when she lets her hair dangle in my face as she’s dancing just for me. She smells like the ocean and her smile fills my dreams at night.
The funny thing is that my wife thinks I’m a big hero because I am always so willing to do the errands for her. While I’m enjoying the special attention of my bodacious blonde, my wife is getting a little well-deserved rest as the kids play with their friends for a couple hours.
I get what I want without any grief.
Honestly, I think that my wife wouldn’t even care at this point if she knew the truth. But for now, I think it will be my little secret. I know she has her secrets, too. Everyone deserves to have some special time that is just for them.
So guys get it together. Figure out how to do those errands super fast. Find someone that will let your kids hang out with their kids for a few hours. There is something they need in exchange so just figure it out and then provide it for them. Give your wife what she needs and then you get what you want – like a couple hours with the sexiest women you’ve ever seen at Rhode Island Dolls gentlemen’s club in Woonsocket. Be creative and “doing errands” can be as much fun for you as it is for me!