How NOT to Fall in Love with a Dancer at Rhode Island Dolls Strip Club
Tight bottoms, toned legs, dazzling smiles…the Rhode Island Dolls are definitely charming. Some of the men and women in Woonsocket think they can resist these seductive dancers, but many guests catch themselves mentally planning first dates and even anniversary dinners after a visit to this fun strip club. If T-Pain’s “I’m in Love With a Stripper” is your unofficial theme song, take a few precautions to prevent yourself from falling in love with an exotic dancer at our gentleman’s club.
Leave Your Glasses At Home
Now is not the time to wear your specs. Leave your glasses at home and take your contact lenses out before you visit our Rhode Island strip club. Blurry vision decreases the odds of falling in love with one of our beautiful, charismatic dancers. You’ll still be able to make out the outline of each perky breast, but be strong. You are NOT going to fall in love tonight! You’ve got this situation under control!
Sit in the Back
If you have 20/20 vision and usually grab a seat near the stage, move to the back. You want to be as far away from the action as possible to avoid being hit by Cupid’s arrow. Close your eyes if you have to, but that might not be enough. Hide out in the bathroom or wait for your buddies in the parking lot. Our Woonsocket club is packed with gorgeous women, and hanging out in the parking lot is the best way to avoid them.
Say “No” to Lap Dances
Avoid one-on-one time with our sexy dancers at all costs. The RI Dolls are all super hot and lap dances only emphasize this fact. Do you really want one of those firm bodies grinding against yours? Don’t give in to love so easily. Keep your distance and don’t even think about getting a private dance from one of our sexy strippers. Definitely make sure not to schedule some private time in the VIP Room because things get even better in there and we don’t know if you’ll be able to leave the club without presenting your dancer with a handwritten sonnet on the napkin that came with your cheese fries.
Skip Our Special Events
You’ve probably heard about our Saturday Bike Runs. Fans of the RI Dolls gather together on the first Saturday of each month for an incredible day filled with poker, motorcycles, and fundraising. Oh, and gorgeous women. When the weather is nice, the Rhode Island Dolls wear bikinis – formfitting bikinis that accent their curves nicely. Is that something you can handle without getting all lovey-dovey? Play it safe and make yourself comfortable at home on the sofa.
Don’t Take Advantage of Our Drink Specials
Our Rhode Island strip club is best known for its breathtaking exotic dancers, but we also have some pretty awesome drink specials. You probably already know – hopefully not from personal experience – that the right amount of alcohol can transform an ugly duckling into Gisele Bundchen. We have an entire club filled with model-worthy dancers so just imagine what will happen if you sip a few beers or enjoy a bottle of champagne. Skip the free drinks offered during weekday lunches and forget about the dollar drafts on Monday nights. If you don’t want to fall in love with a stripper, we’ll do what we can to help you honor your goals.
Be Rude
Our talented dancers don’t pay much attention to rude patrons, so shout out obscenities and act as obnoxious as you possibly can when you visit our Woonsocket venue. Bonus: This type of behavior may get you thrown out of the club, making it even more difficult for you to become afflicted with the warm fuzzies for one of our entertainers. See, we’ve always got your best interests in mind.
Don’t Come to the Club
Doctors are always rambling on and on about how prevention is key, so prevent a crush on a dancer from developing by staying home. Seeing the Rhode Island Dolls in person is just too much for some patrons, and we totally understand if you find it impossible not to become completely love-struck when you see the perfect bodies and skilled dance moves of our strippers. We’re even open on holidays, so make sure that you avoid our club all 365 days of the year. In fact, avoid our website too because there are a few pics of the RI Dolls there. We’ve got your back – no need to thank us.