I got divorced last year. Well, my wife left me for another man and we sold the house and the divorce went through about a year ago. I have to admit, the first few weeks after she left, I was in really bad shape. I was barely managing to go to work and keep my job. If I wasn’t working, I was sitting around my new bachelor pad feeling like crap, eating like crap, and living like crap. It was not a good thing.
Last week my divorce papers came through and everything was final. I was surprised at how it made me feel. I was elated and depressed at the same time. One of my friends just happened to come over and he saw the divorce papers on my kitchen table and he instantly knew what was going on.
Today he showed up and said he had something special planned for me. He told me that if I didn’t get up and drag my butt into the shower they were going to carry me in there and it wasn’t going to be pretty. So, I did what I was told. He made me get dressed and then they put me in the car.
I didn’t know where we were going but I didn’t care really. I wanted to stay home and binge-watch something stupid on Netflix so I wouldn’t have to think. They took me to Rhode Island Dolls in Woonsocket, RI.
How cliché, I thought. A strip joint.
At first I just sat there. I refused to have a good time. I ate what they put in front of me. I drank the beer they gave me. But I was damned if I was going to enjoy life again.
And then my favorite dancer showed up. She took me by the hand and led me to a private VIP Room. There was a bottle of champagne waiting and she said that she was all mine for the next hour and my buddies had reserved the time with her to celebrate the beginning of my new life.
We talked and she danced. Then she talked some more. We drank champagne and listened to music. I talked about what I was feeling because talking to her is way different than talking to one of the guys. She was sweet and empathetic. She was understanding.
You know, there wasn’t anything in particular she said or did that brought me out of my funk. But I felt more alive than I had felt in…well, I wasn’t sure how long it had been. Since sometime before my wife had actually told me she was leaving.
After that hour with her, I was feeling better and I rejoined my friend who was sitting up at the stage. He passed me a pile of bills and ordered a drink for me. I didn’t really need it though.
We ordered some food and hung out for a few more hours. Some of the time we just sat around, watching the dancers. But we did a lot of talking, too. We made plans for the summer and he reminded me that I could do whatever I wanted to do now that I was single. I could date or not date. I could get a new apartment. I could spend my money on vacations or strippers. It was entirely my call.
It has been a long time since I lived just for myself. I wasn’t sure if I remembered how. But you can be damn sure that I’m going to try. And I think that part of that is going to be coming to Rhode Island Dolls more often!
We left later that night and I didn’t feel like my life was over. My favorite dancer went back to work and I didn’t really get a chance to thank her again. I think she knew how much that time meant to me though. It was about finding some joy in my life again.
I’m starting to feel like I can have a life again. I have good friends. My buddy knew just what I needed to get out of my funk.
I think I might even be ready to start dating again. I’m not looking for anything too serious. Not like I want to get married again right away. But it couldn’t hurt to look right?